BTT EP 1
===
[00:00:00] Welcome to Between the Tabs. This is my Mood Board podcast where creativity, growth, business, and the real life happening between it all is going down. I'm your host Kleidi Jeen and we are gonna talk about the stuff that lives between work and who we really are. And we're gonna do it in four parts. Okay, so grab your drink, your matcha, your smoothie, whatever it is, and let's hop into part one.
So I've been researching off and on the default mode network, and this is a part of the brain that controls some things and. While it is responsible for some issues, , such as different mental illnesses. But the cool thing is that it's also responsible for the creative ideas that arise. You know, like the ones that pop up whack-a-mole style when you're in the shower and you just can't even turn them off.
And this [00:01:00] is happening because. The DMN, the default mode network activates when your body is doing something in autopilot, so when you're taking a shower or when you're brushing your teeth or taking that same walk to the metro or the grocery store or something like that, , doing the same thing that you do every day.
That's when the DMN cuts on and starts to do its thing. And so it's because the automation of all those things allows different parts of the brain to be liberated so when you're brushing your teeth, your brain doesn't have to focus on lifting your arm or making sure to go in those circular motions and things like that. You can do those things on auto because you've done them so many times. And so yeah, parts of the brain are now liberated to just wander and when your brain is wandering, that's the DMN baby doing its thing.
And with the liberation of the other parts of the brain, [00:02:00] that's where you get that proliferation of creative thoughts and creative ideas. And as much as it can evoke creative ideas though, the DMN can also start to evoke anxiety ruminating and worrying like, oh gosh, how am I gonna get my next paycheck?
Or how am I going to take care of the kids? Or how am I gonna get this flight to go see whatever? And so it's that ability to just kind of wander that can be put towards something useful, something fun, something exciting and entertaining like creativity. But also it can go in the other direction.
So if you do find this kind of thing happening to you where, when the DMN activates, when you're on autopilot. It might start off with nice creative ideas, but then all of a sudden you might end up worrying about having like a Handmaiden's Tales future or something like that, [00:03:00] right?
So if that happens, one thing that some studies have shown to be useful, to be helpful to get out of that is to meditate. It's been shown through studies that meditation, especially if you are already practicing it so maybe not as much for the newbies. I don't think the data is there for, if you know, like this is your first time meditating, it's not, necessarily gonna work, but if you have done it before . If you start to ruminate and go into worrying and anxiety and things like that, you can decrease that mental wandering, like really super effectively.
And then you develop that awareness, right? There's the awareness there that, okay. I'm taking a shower. Creative ideas are gonna come probably, but also, you know, if you're prone to worrying, you know that that's gonna come too. So you can also mitigate it with your own self-awareness. Like , oh, here I am, I am worrying. [00:04:00] I am in the default mode network and it's activating, and now it's bringing me towards worrying. And so in that noticing, you can make a decision, you can make a choice. Like, okay, am I gonna keep doing this or am I going to think about something else?
Or maybe do a little meditation real quick to sort of calm the thoughts down and, bring my attention away from each single thought that is proliferating, that is coming up, that's popping up. It's said, I haven't looked at this number in a while, but I think there are 20,000 thoughts that happen per minute in our brains.
20,000 thoughts. And if that's not correct, I'm actually gonna look it up real quick after I record and place it in the show notes. But we have thousands and thousands of thoughts per minute, and so if we really are living our lives where those thoughts are taking hold [00:05:00] of our focus, then that's really not a way to live.
It's the opposite, right? It's the other way around. Like we operate best when we are in full presence and observation of what's happening around us. And so if we observe that the thoughts are taking over and that's not something we want, then we do something like meditation or taking some breaths, some mindful breaths to gently jog us out of being ruled by our thoughts instead of the thoughts coming to us to help us navigate life, if that makes sense.
So that's part one of episode one of Between the tabs, and I hope that resonated even just a little bit.
And we're gonna move into part two, which is about something happening over on Instagram that I really can't get enough of. Not gonna lie. And what that thing is, is, yes. [00:06:00] Series. Is it just me or is every creative person and their mama doing a series over on ig? Like I don't even open the app unless I have some popcorn and orange juice, like on the ready wait.
Side note, popcorn and orange juice is a very lovely way to get some magnesium and some vitamin C in without feeling like you're being so healthy anyway. So if I don't have those things ready, like I'm not even going on the app. Okay. And if you're wondering about me, you know what the answer is: yes, yes, yes, yes!
I will be joining in the next couple of months, the series bandwagon over on IG. And this is actually something I've been wanting to do for about a year now. It's something I've been thinking about for a long time. I really like the way a series kind of. It, it's [00:07:00] almost, it's very strategic for a brain like mine and probably like yours, that's really creative, but also really likes to plan. You can see the details just as clearly as you can see the bigger picture.
Something like a series just feels really like when I think about it, it's a dopamine hit, right? It feels like a really neat way to express that creativity. Also, to plan out or show the plan of what it is that I'm doing, like with my business with Soft Sundae. And also when I hit those milestones, it can be something that's really motivating for me and really exciting for me to keep going on this journey of doing what I want to do, creating what I want to create with Soft Sundae. But this one thing about a series about creating, building in public, creating in public, working in public is I absolutely do not do well with doing it in real time. I [00:08:00] cannot put it out there on Instagram that I'm creating this thing and then go and actually create it.
My mind. The way my neurodiversity works is: then all of that shuts off. My ability to produce something shuts down big time. So my way around that is going to be because I'm gonna do this series thing. I just really love this idea and I love the documentation part of it. As a past collections manager for a museum, I just, I, I really dig the documentation part of it too. It's like creating your own archive. But for me to do this successfully, what I'm gonna do is actually build my business, do the work, and documenting while I'm working, but I'll put the series together after a chunk of things are done. So I'll still be, working on Soft Sundae and launching it, you know, relaunching the website.
Getting prepared to launch my group course, my live course on [00:09:00] boundaries . But best believe a big chunk of the work will have already been done if it's gonna be shown on a series, because I just can't build and build in public like at all. I just, it's just something that makes me freeze internally.
It makes the freeze stress response activate big time. Big time. And when that happens to us, we don't have to let it stop us, right? When we have a stress response, a freeze or fawn, or run the heck away, you know, with flight, we don't have to let those things stop us. But we can find ways that are more gentle, that are more.
Open. Our nervous systems are more open to in order to get the things done in life that we want to get done without freaking our bodies out in the process. Like you don't have to push past your limits to get something done. And so I'm sharing this serious thing with you as a way to show an [00:10:00] example of doing something that freaks my nervous system out.
But finding a way to do it, that that doesn't freak my nervous system out, that my nervous system can ride or die with, and support me on that journey and have capacity to make it happen. Last thing about this is I am actually going to learn how to build my series with, Michelle from Hello Lemon. Go look her up on Instagram. She's hosting soon, in mid-May a Build Your Series, workshop where she is gonna teach how to build a series based on what it is you are trying to do, whether you're launching something, whether you just kind of, what I'm doing, want to.
Be held accountable for a very large project. She's gonna teach the basics of how to build a series, and Michelle has been doing this for, I think a few years now, since maybe 2023.
And she's really delightful. I've had [00:11:00] her as a guest on, my Rocky Road series last year. She's really nice. I really can't wait to experience this workshop with her. She's also a really straightforward, no bells and whistles kind of teacher. She teaches like really direct, so it's really easy to digest.
So she doesn't even know I'm sharing this. So this isn't an affiliate episode or an ad or anything like that. I just wanted to share that and I'll share the link to her. To her workshop, Build Your Series. I'll include that in the show notes here as well. So yeah, those are my thoughts on that.
And so we're gonna move on to part three. And let me be honest with you, I have like zero desire to hustle. I am not in this online business world like guru world, that's not me. I have no desire to hustle, and I truly believe that I can [00:12:00] have a creative online business that can support me and my family without working 25 8, burning the candle at both ends.
I truly believe that this is something that is possible. And if this is something that you're doing already, send me an email and share about, how that journey is looking for you. And, speaking of doing an Instagram series, I. I think I'm gonna document this, that I can have this creative business without hustling 24 or seven, and I'm gonna document that.
That's my series, that's what it's gonna be about. It's my business journey, without hustling. And right now is a good time for me to do that because I am finally, after years in business, I am finally setting up proper foundations. For my business. And not gonna lie, before I was like, there's a reggae song by Eek-A- Mouse, about building your house on the [00:13:00] water.
It's about being that fool who's building his house on the sand without a solid foundation in that. I've been the fool. I have been that fool , for several years. And not for nothing. It's part of it is because I just didn't know. I didn't know what these foundations were. I came from working in a federal government position, for all of my career to online business.
And also in between, working as a full-time. Yoga teacher, part-time yoga teacher. Before that, doing all these trainings, having all this support, I was in this bubble of just serious positivity for much of my life, and I'm very thankful for that. But what that meant for me was that I started to develop this mindset where you know, you should say yes to every opportunity and everything's gonna work out. [00:14:00] And I like really lived by that and it really worked for me for a long time. And so I took that into online business when I started to move, my yoga work and healing work that online. And actually, even past 2020 that was working for me for a little bit until it just didn't. And so, now finally, years and years later, I'm finally building the right foundation, a real foundation for an online business that, that will help it to be something that I'm not hustling to make happen and to make work.
And so that's what I'm doing now and I'm doing it following my own Sundae Life framework. I'm following my own methodology, what I know that works from experimentation over the last many years, and that culminating into my Sundae life framework, my Sundae life method.
I am actually using that [00:15:00] to, to practice what I preach and to build my business in this way that is aligned and honors my capacity and. It keeps me sane, but also it does express my creativity, express who I am. It supports me, financially, and otherwise, and, with a sense of fulfillment.
So I'm pausing when I need to. I'm doing things like eating well and creating like delightful dishes that make me smile, I'm exercising in fun ways for my self care. I am, I'm super clear on my creative vision and I'm not pushing, I'm just not gonna do it. I'm not hustling and, and hell, I can't do that.
I'm parenting two boys under 10, one of them is Neurodiverse. I'm neurodiverse. I have a sensory sensitivity to noise and light that will drive anyone crazy and my last 10 years have been, hard af like [00:16:00] super hard. So, right now I'm letting that go and I'm imagining myself like floating into success.
I'm doing the work, I'm grounded, but I'm also imagining myself just floating into this gracefully and not forcing my way into something that I'm ready to step gracefully into. I don't know if this resonates at all. Let me know what you think, where you are on this path as well.
And so now we're gonna go into the last , part four of our little Mood Board podcast here. We've gone through several moods and it's Wednesday, this podcast drops on Wednesday, and so we're over here looking for dopamine hits between the tasks, between the tabs. And you know what I think will get us through the rest of this week gracefully?
Remembering that everything is not for everybody. Everything ain't for everybody, and you have to feel into that for yourself and be [00:17:00] honest about it, because if you're not honest about it and it's not for you, say you actually don't wanna spend your afternoon at a networking event, or you don't actually have the energy to help your friend move apartments today, or you actually don't want to exchange email information with a person. So if it's not for you and you're not honest about it, you're erasing yourself, actually. You're overriding your truth. And what's killer is you're doing it to be kind. You're doing it to be a nice person. Right. But how unkind is that to yourself though?
So if you're struggling with that. , Everything isn't for everybody and that's okay. If you're struggling with that, you can download my freebie. It's called Erasing Self Erasure, and in there you get 10 simple reframes around what kindness [00:18:00] actually means and how to tune into your body's responses to get your real honest answer if this thing is something that is for you or not.
And it makes it 10 times easier once you're clear on it to say that no, if it isn't for you, instead of that automatic yes. So download it using the link in the show notes. It's called Erasing Self Erasure, and it's really helpful and something you can really quickly like glance through. You don't have to sit down in a corner for three hours and figure it out.
Once you get the download, you look at each reframe and start with one that speaks to you really strongly and go from there.
So I will meet you next time when we are surfing for that dopamine hit between the tabs AKA next Wednesday. Bye.